A year has come and gone, since our lives were turned upside down.
A year ago at this time I didn't know how we were going to make it through all this.
But we are, day by day.
when your in the moment of something horrible happening, your scared, you just want to curl up in a ball close your eyes and never wake up until you know its over with, but we couldn't we had to be strong, for the family.
when your in the moment of something horrible, you pray over and over, you think your not strong enough to go through all this, that your not going to make it, but we are making it, its been a whole year.
It wasn't an easy year, and its still not easy but we are making it.
There are times where I still asked the Lord why? I don't know why I ask him this, I know he isn't going to tell me, not yet.
It hasn't just been the accident there is so much more, each of us have gone through our own trials at this time, but we are still being strong for each other, where does this strength come from?
Faith. Love. Humility. Being a family, a close family.
Its hard being back in a place where I don't want to be, Yes I have lots of friends and family that live there and I miss them but its not a place for me anymore.
I don't feel comfortable there, people treated my family horribly through hard times, and we found out who really cared for our family.
They are the ones that stuck with my family, they are the ones that call my family just to see how they are doing and to let them know they are still praying for them and love them, and I appreciate those people, I have true love for them, because they helped us be strong.
so now it can only be a place to visit.
The hardest thing for me to learn through all this and more is that I'm not in control, the Lord is.
I've always been a control freak, and when I'm not in control it scares me.
I can control the outcome of things by the decisions I make but I can't control things that are supposed to happen.
I can live my life the way I am supposed to and things will go a lot smoother, or I can have the strength that I didn't know I had, but I still can't control what is supposed to happen.
Live your life the way your supposed to.
So here's to another year, making it day by day.
15 years ago
2 comments:
I don't know if you remember me... but I remember you two.
They always say that you know who your real friends are during hard times. It is very sad that you had to see that first hand... seeing the ugly side of people is never pleasant and more than likely very hurtful especially if you trusted them once.
I would describe myself as a control freak too. I have learned that there are somethings I absolutely will never have control of and they are the things that frustrate me on a regular basis. So I remind myself to breathe in and out... and remember like you have who is really in charge... of everything.
Thanks for sharing your feelings. It is hard to do that sometimes.
ToOdLeS.
Hey Lindy, I am so glad that you all are trying day by day to be stronger. I have no idea what you all went through and am truly sorry for the way people treated you and your family. It's so very hard to believe people that you know and love can do that to you. I truly got to know your mom when I worked with her and she is the most humble sweetest person I have ever met and though I tried to comfort her and talk to her, truly she helped me be a better and a more humble person. I really hope you all are doing better and hope that you know a lot of people care for your family. Thanks for expressing your feelings on here, it's amazing how strong you are to do that. BE HAPPY!
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